Division 1 athletes are local celebrities at school. They walk around with their parkas and embroidered backpacks and seem to be everywhere. After careful observation of all the athletes on campus, we decided to give all of the teams superlatives. This was 100% scientific and not at all based on vibes. I mean, what kind of journalist would we be if we solely relied on vibes and didn’t back up our research?? 

Who would you not let date your child (Not hating, just stating!) 

Who would you let run the school (Because let’s be real, we all wish we could have John Frye’s salary) 

Most athletic (The D1 athletes of D1 athletes)

Who would you want to be stranded on a desert island with (Just a heads up, we won’t be much help)

Most likely to shatter a world record (We’re manifesting)

Most likely to become a professional athlete (The people at The Triangle tell me they need more pro athletes to write about) 

Best dressed (Excluding the parkas)