The magnificent shaft: Drexel’s newest mascot

Strolling down 33rd Street, you are met with the refreshing sound of honking cars, the sight of cumbersome skyscrapers and nauseatingly delicious smells of halal. As you become immersed in these beloved city charms, you almost forget about your pathetic life as a Drexel University student until you encounter the dreaded beast on the corner […]

Make a dash for cold hard cash

The economy is continuing to inflate like a balloon that is about to pop. The Drexel shaft is penetrating each one of us deeper and deeper by the day. What is one to do when funds are low and working to honestly earn what you deserve is not an option? Just waltz into a crosswalk […]

Fuck ambition

To me, “Ambition Can’t Wait” means a lot of things. It means finding a pair of my underwear floating in a mini lake in the Towers Hall laundry room. It means sleeping in the hollowed-out bookshelves of the Hagerty Library. It means biting into raw chicken from the Hans. It’s the combination of misery and […]

Mi casa, tu casa… it’s everybody’s casa

There are far too many University Housing options on Drexel’s campus. I can barely decide what sauces to put on my food at Cucina Zapata, so you could imagine that choosing where I’ll live in misery for an entire school year isn’t any easier. To save other students like me from this crippling indecisiveness, Drexel […]

Shoot, I need a gun!

Oh, look. Another one. Unfortunately, this is not referencing a DJ Khaled quote, but instead we’re talking about shootings. School shootings to be exact. The desensitization to school shootings has reached new heights. We seem to see it in the news, read about it online and hear people discussing it, yet we brush it off […]

Amazon HQ2 delivered to you

 Following the announcement earlier this year including Philadelphia as a candidate for Amazon’s HQ2, we would like to propose a potential location on campus. Myers Hall has long been scheduled for demolition, and its central location would be perfect for the online shopping behemoth. With easy access to the large student body for their many […]

Muslin ban reexamines the fabric of America

A lot of hysteria has been going around the lamestream media lately with regard to President Donald Trump’s proposal for a renewed ban. I for one wholeheartedly support it, and think that the injunctions from several so-called judges are clear examples of judicial activism. Trump is making good on one of his campaign promises — […]

Hey bitch, this school is cheaper than your mom

I know that you probably don’t want to hear the same argument about the unreasonable cost of Drexel, but I can’t help myself. The detrimental effects this tuition is having on the helpless students is getting out of hand. I don’t condone it and I won’t stand for it. Drexel is too cheap and it […]

Looking through eyes of scorn

A very strange thing happened to me recently: a man at the Dragon statue called me a whore. Now, I’ve been called a slut, a tramp, or a skank before; the usual thing sorority sisters tell each other. But he said it with such conviction that it really caused me to re-examine my life. I […]

Bernie can still win the presidency

It’s certainly a dark time we live in now. I know things are looking bleak – well-respected media outlets are saying things like “President Trump,” and “the president, Donald, Trump.” Many people surveyed even think that Trump is already the president of the United States. But don’t worry, fellow socially conscious nineteen-year-olds – all hope […]

127 hours of gaming later

Like most of you reading this, I go to Drexel. And you know what that means — papers, stress, hallucinations derived from sleep deprivation and caffeine-induced heart attacks. I have three papers that are due on a Monday and I still have to study for finals! Man, that’s a lot of work. How can I […]


Journalism is a lie. Reality isn’t really reality at all. Everything you think you know is probably wrong because papers all over the world have been deceiving the public for decades on behalf of Russia, publishing deceptive and incorrect facts. If you know all of this, it should come as no shock that The Triangle […]


The Rectangle Editorial Board has made our decision. Drexel students have long worked towards a single goal: a communist society unified by the worship of our great lord Lucifer. The Editorial Board therefore endorses Bernie Sanders to bring about Full Communism Now, Hail Satan. Our previous endorsements of the Socialist Workers’ Party were mere protest […]

Fuck it, I’m free ballin’.

  As I was watching the news today, I was appalled when my vision was accosted with the image of women running around with their nipples out. Their nipples! Can you believe it? That’s so inappropriate. They seduce men and other women with those things. After further research, I discovered that this was the so-called […]

Let’s not lie: #Nolivesmatter

I have heard the plebeians grumbling recently about some debate between the hashtags #blacklivesmatter and #alllivesmatter, with some arguing as to which better describes the state of different humans at this juncture. How cute. Once again, the sheeple of the world have herded together around a fire to force us all the sing “Kumbaya” and […]

How to have a debate with your friends

With the 2016 elections looming over everybody, people want to know how they can force their views on others. Many are out of practice since the 2012 election. It’s sad to see how many people disagree, and it’s a competition to see who can convince the most people otherwise. Because of everyone’s lack of practice, […]

Women’s bathrooms: Why are they still a thing?

  Space is a precious commodity in a bustling city like Philadelphia. Real estate that you could buy for a song out in the ‘burbs may well cost you an arm and a leg out here in our city of brotherly all-hours construction. It is for this reason and more that I propose the following: […]

US blood money should be better spent

President Obama recently made a budget proposal with the usual ridiculous ideas that have come to seem normal from the White House over the past seven years, such as reallocating Environmental Protection Agency funding in favor of “public-private partnerships” (corporate sell-outs) or funneling more education money into the hands of fat-cat university presidents like Juan […]

Pies should be triangles not circles

Last month was the annual celebration of Pi Day, an important holiday that’s enjoyed worldwide by math enthusiasts. Interestingly, people who develop severe allergic reactions to a simple 2+2=4 math problem also celebrate Pi Day because of free food. The Pi Day of 2015 is uniquely significant, since 3/14/15, 9:26:53 corresponds to the first 10 […]

Want green space? Blow up Left Bank

Back when I was looking at a bunch of different colleges as a recent GED-recipient, I remember loving everything about Drexel University — except the lack of a quad. Sure, it’s got some great benefits, like a bunch of non-flammable surfaces and having dorms close enough to classes that I can get there while on […]

Drexel purchases Center City mall

I know there’s been a lot of conversation lately about some changes to campus, so I’d like to shed some light on a few of these issues. As the director of Administrative and Business Services, I help make sure Drexel University’s money is being used wisely. Drexel is known for having a vibrant modern urban […]

Fuck all the readers

Dear reader: Fuck you. Fuck you in your fucking face, you fucking fuck. No, seriously. The Rectangle Editorial Board hates every single one of you who wastes space on this planet, and each and every one of you pricks should die in a fire. The truth is, here at The Rectangle, we hate our readers. […]

High tuition should make you happy

Every so often Drexel University notifies us that we owe them money. Of course payment of this money is optional. The other option is to stop attending classes and become the next Steve Jobs. But since Jobs is as dead as this analogy and Apple is well on its way without your assistance, maybe it’s […]

Cats: a serious threat to society

While bread-and-butter Americans are worried about the IRS scandals, the advent of affordable health care and the insidious leftist agenda, a new homegrown threat is lurking in our own homes. Just last week, an Oregon family was held hostage in their bedroom and forced to call 911 after a rabid, 22-pound predator mauled their child. […]


“Live It 24/7.” Can you believe how pitifully hypocritical Drexel’s slogan is? The University takes so much pride in giving students the chance to work toward their dream careers at all times, yet there’s a break of at least one week at the end of every term. The last time we checked, taking a break […]

Let’s take Drexel University and push it somewhere else!

Drexel University isn’t in a great location, when you really think about it. Sure, 30th Street Station is right there, and we have convenient access to Center City, but is it really worth it? With DrexelALERTs coming in day after day about shootings, stabbings and, of course, cookie truck robberies, we just have to face […]

Spring brake cancellation

When I got the DrexelALERT that all students will be required to stay an extra five days on co-op or in school (and that Drexel Police had cleared the area), I was understandably upset. I thought maybe Drexel had learned from #MyLegacy and realized Drexel Dragons have had enough with purchasable school spirit. But no, […]